The headwaiter of an elegant restaurant recoiled in disgust as a man in boots, torn jeans and a leather jacket approached him. "Hey, man," he said, "where's the toilet?" "Go down the hall and turn left, "replied the headwaiter. "When you see the sign marked 'Gentlemen; pay no attention to it and go right on in."
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Girl: How much is a soft drink ? Waitress: Fifty cents. Girl: How much is refill ? Waitress: The first is free. Girl: Well then, I'll have a refill.
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Have you ever seen a man-eating tiger ? No, but in the restaurant next door I once saw a man eating chicken !
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An American tourist was lunching in a restaurant in China where the specialty was duck. The waiter explained each dish as he brought it to the table. "This is the breast of the duck; this the leg of the duck; this is the wing of the duck; etc." Then came the dish that the American knew was chicken. He waited for the explanation. Silence. "Well?" he finally asked, "What's this?" The waiter replied, "It's a friend of duck."
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Three couples are dining together. The American husband says to his wife: "Pass me the honey, Honey". The English husband says to his wife: "Pass me the sugar, Sugar". The [you name it] husband says to his wife: "Pass me the steak, Dumb cow".
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Why was the restaurant called "Out of this World"? Because it was full of Unidentified Frying Objects.
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Patron 1: I eat at a different restaurant every day. Patron 2: I don't tip, either.
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Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon? Great food but no atmosphere.
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Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
So why aren't you laughing?
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Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup.
Yes sir, they're not very good swimmers.
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Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup!
Yes, sir, it's the hot water that kills them.
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Customer: Give me a hot dog.
Waiter: With pleasure.
Customer: No, with mustard.
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